Back in 1993, a friend invited me to join a book group. I had a new baby. And a toddler. My husband was very busy with his career — and I was trying to figure out if I could still even have one (a career, that is). Life was full and busy and I had no time for new things . . . like a book group. But I said YES anyway, and it was absolutely the right answer.
My old Grand Rapids book group (even now I sigh with nostalgia whenever I think about it) (I needed to let it go when we moved to Kalamazoo 10 years later) (I grieve still) . . . offered me a whole new “personal portal” into reading. I mean, I had always been a reader, but other than classroom discussions, I had never talked about the books I read before . . . with other people, with friends. And there’s a lot of power in doing that – the reading together and then the discussing it afterward. I read books I never would have picked up before joining my book group. I expanded my reading horizons, discovered new authors, and stretched out into different genres of literature. I learned to think critically about the books I read, and I learned how to articulate my thoughts – out loud – in our discussions. But, perhaps best of all, my book group gave me a new circle of friends.
It was a wonderful experience for me. And, as it turns out, reading . . . as part of a book group . . . is actually GOOD for us!
Most of us here in the Read With Us LOUNGE are already aware of the benefits of . . . just regular old reading (books we choose and then read all on our own). Reading . . . fosters empathy and helps us develop new perspectives. It hones critical thinking skills, builds our vocabulary, and helps us become better writers. Reading is even a proven stress reduction technique. Really, the list of benefits from reading is long and critically important, especially in, well . . . These Times.
Taking it all just a little bit further . . . it turns out that reading as a member of a book group is even BETTER for us. According to this January 2025 article from Psychology Today, taking part in a book group provides a number of benefits beyond reading alone. Being part of a book group increases social connection, which helps counter loneliness . . . which, in turn, helps combat physical ailments and improves mental health. Sharing thoughts and opinions about the books we read in groups can build confidence and improve social skills and self esteem. By offering members a safe space to explore social issues, book group discussions can help foster personal growth and self-reflection.
Reading and discussing books with a book group . . . enhances all the benefits of reading!
I’ve tried to re-create the magic of my old book group in other ways since moving away from Grand Rapids. I tried another local group, but it wasn’t a great fit for me and, over time, I let it go (good people, incompatible reading tastes . . . ). I take part in a few “niche” book groups when the book selections sound interesting to me (one sponsored by my local independent book store, one sponsored by my League of Women Voters chapter), and I even take part in SharonSaysSo’s online “Governerds” book group. But they’re all quite large groups . . . and the opportunity to really contribute in a meaningful way – and to connect socially with others – is more challenging.
And now, of course, I’ve got . . . Read With Us. When Bonny and Carole and I first launched our “online-bloggy-book-club” back in 2019, we hoped that it might be a fun and interesting adventure that . . . with time . . . could foster some connection between members, even if online-based. Of course, this was before Covid, and we had no idea that Zoom would arrive just in time to make the whole virtual-book-group thing more viable, but it seems to be working. Although we’re scattered here and there across the country, we’ve created a vibrant group of stalwart members who truly enjoy getting together quarterly to discuss the books we read. I’d say we have become a virtual community. And this makes me happy.
As for me, I really like having a book group in the mix of my reading life. I like challenging myself to read interesting books – including those books I might not choose to read otherwise. I like the practice of thinking critically about the books as I read them — and then listening to the insights of other readers. (I often find my perspective changes about a book after a good book group discussion.) And I especially like making connections and building a community with other women who enjoy reading and talking about books. (And I say women because, well . . . it’s always been women in my book group experiences.)
So.
How about YOU?What do you think? Have you ever been part of a book group? What was the experience like for you? If you like(d) it, what work(s)(ed) for you? And if it didn’t work for you, what turned you off – and what might have made the experience better?
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The Read With Us LOUNGE is open all summer long!
Grab a book. Find a comfy spot to read with us for awhile – and chime in with your thoughts and insight, too.
No rules!
Just fun!
And be sure to visit Bonny and Carole today to see what they’re talking about in the LOUNGE.
I have not had great experiences with reading in groups. I do enjoy many of the social aspects, but a lot of reading groups have become performative experiences. For example, I am not interested in cooking for a reading group. And as I have said in previous comments, I am a bit resistant to having someone else tell me what I am going to read. Having said that, I reviewed your Read With Us list, and I have read many of them long ago, and I really enjoyed Trespasses by Louise Kennedy, but my life at the time did not allow me to read it on your schedule. I have not eliminated the prospect of joining your group as I really feel many of your members are people I would enjoy, and I think I can manage to put on clothes, comb my hair, pour myself a glass of prosecco, and turn on my computer. At least sometimes I can manage this. 😉
Read With Us has kind of been a revelation to me. I’ve always thought of reading as a solitary activity, mainly because that’s how I’ve always done it. I joined a library book club (briefly) when we lived in MD, but was disappointed by the romance books they chose to read. I was a tiny bit hesitant when you first suggested RWU because I sometimes have the fear that discussing the book will feel like homework and what if I don’t like the book? But just like you said, there have been books that have been a bit challenging for me, but I’m not sure I would have picked up Shuggie Bain by myself or discovered Douglas Stuart. My reading life would have been poorer without him. There are times I feel a bit anxious before our discussions but the discussions and the people participating have always added something that I couldn’t have come up with myself. Long story short, I really enjoy RWU, can’t quite imagine my life without it now, with the added bonus that it’s good for my mental health. Thank you!
I might be biased, but Read With Us is the best book group I have had the good fortune to participate in! I have tried several book groups over the course of my life and not a single one did I ever “click” with… for a variety of reasons. There was a point in time when reading was low on the daily list… small kids, single parenting, work… all made for little reading time during the day. I think the idea this group has about quarterly reads makes being part of a group achievable for a person at any stage. I agree with you on the “group think” changing my opinion on many books that I thought I did not care much for! lt is a very good thing to have a group of people who read together!
Count me as another who loves our RWU group! Because of this group I’ve read books that I might otherwise not have picked up. When we first moved to our house, I joined a book club at the local book store. We read some very good books and I enjoyed sitting around a book store discussing what we read. If the store hadn’t closed (sad), I would still most likely belong to the group. I also think of our blogging community (outside of RWU) as a book group in a way. I have gotten so many wonderful recommendations of books from everyone – Unraveled Wednesdays hosted by Kat are always fun because so many books are discussed along with everyone’s making!
In 1987 I joined a book group and I’m still in the same group today. It will be 40 years next year and it is still going strong. We have younger readers and the group is so vibrant. I, also, like the on-line group I found in 2020 (because of the pandemic-FictionMatters) as they are also a mix of ages and interests. The books they read interesting and different than my RL group. Both groups read books worth discussing and I learn so much. I wish I could join you for RWU but Tuesday is the day my knitting group gets together (in person) and we have been together since 2004. I feel very fortunate to have many great friends because of the groups in my life. RWU would be another wonderful connection and I hope someday I’ll be able to join you.
I felt that way about an old knitting group from our previous life. Hasn’t been the same since. Nice people, just a different mindset. Eventually, I’m sure there will be a good fit. So I know what you mean about nostalgia. I hear you about being exposed to different genres, etc. As I’ve gotten older and life is shorter, I am more about seeking serenity than the stimulation of constant adjustment to the new. Fine even at 70….ummm not so much at 80. But I do love hearing from you all about your new discoveries so I can pick and choose what old favorite authors are up to and any new titles that may be “just my thing.” Thank you for that, Kym
I’ve been in a couple of in person, and lately, on-line book groups over the years. One of my favorite parts is reading a book that is not in my usual wheelhouse – but with other people — and learning to appreciate it. Long ago it was King Leopold’s Ghost.
And the chance to connect with other readers has led to friends I never would have had.
But I also love just reading the books that make ME happy. There’s only so much time in life, so lately I’ve been learning how to skip a book or two, even if it’s for one of my groups, if I really would rather be reading something else.
I will say that Read with Us has grown into a really nice group — good books, right sized, good discussions with the right amount of cordial disagreement (none is dull, too much, stressful)
When I lived in NY State I had a wonderful neighborhood book group and was sad to leave that behind when I moved to IL in 2006. I really enjoy The Read With Us group, both the books we read and our discussions. I also belong to Fiction Matters, the online group that Margene mentioned. I enjoy reading and discussing the variety of books selected by these groups, many I never would have read on my own.
Being able to discuss books with these groups helps me to be a better reader and adds to my enjoyment of reading!
Let’s hear it for Book Clubs! I’m intrigued by the fact that no one in the comments mentioned a library book club as most libraries (around here, at least) have them. The one at my library was run by my Assistant Director until she retired 3 years ago and I took it over. I really didn’t want to, but now I’m so glad I did. It’s a wonderful group of women and I’ve learned a lot from meeting with them. And you know I love our RWU group. I do think it would be nice to be in a book club I don’t have to run, though. Maybe some day.
I’ve been with Read With Us from book one. For years I just answered questions on the blog as I was caretaker for my mother and then my father. I have now joined the online zoom and it has been great.
I also belong to a semi local book group that popped up during Covid when a new Used Bookstore opened to help special needs kids with job opportunities and that has also been great. We meet September to June every 6 – 10 weeks or so as a bunch of members (and the leader) are professors at a local University and we work around testing, etc.
I’m a member of a small but mighty local book group that meets monthly. It began in 1994 and I was invited to join in 1998. Members have come and gone – some moving away, some deciding the group isn’t for them but there is a core group of five or six of us that has remained constant. It’s a great group and I enjoy it for the reasons you and others list above. The way we choose books insures everyone’s suggestions are considered and then together we make our list for the year. Discussing a book with other readers has taught me to think more thoughtfully about the books I read. More informally I have coffee with two good friends. All three of us are readers so we often spend time discussing what we are reading – so I suppose that is an informal kind of book group – although we don’t call it that and certainly chat about wide ranging subjects.
I always wanted to be in a book group/club, but I never came across one that was really about reading and discussing the actual book, let alone one that was willing to read “hard” books. So I’m so thankful to you, Bonny, and Carole started RWU because it’s been exactly what I’ve been looking for. You pick good books that I (almost always) enjoy reading, and when we meet, we actually talk about the book! I still think it would be amazing to have a RWU retreat where we could meet in person, but Zoom has been such a great way for all of us to get together even though we’re so spread out across the country.