Today is one of those . . . memorable . . . days for me. It’s a double-whammy of a memorable day for me, actually.
Sixteen years ago, this is the day that someone in the medical profession first uttered the word “cancer” in association with . . . me. (There was no diagnosis. Yet. Just the official beginning of a journey I didn’t want to be taking.)
And eight years ago, this is the day that my mom died.
Heavy stuff for just a regular day in September.
Instead of feeling weighed down by these anniversaries and wallowing in sadness, I choose to move forward in a different direction. With time and perspective, I can see that I learned some rather important life-lessons from both of these . . . happenings. And, really, they both kind of boil down to the same essential lesson . . .
Don’t wait.
If there is something you want to do, do it now.
If there is something you want to say, say it now.
Because we aren’t guaranteed a future. At some point, the bottom will drop out of our comfortable worlds. We shouldn’t assume we have time. It’s best to strive to live our lives without regrets. (As Warren Zevon famously said, “Enjoy every sandwich.”)
I like to use this day – September 10 – as a gentle reminder to myself . . . to live a life where I “do good” . . . for myself and for those I encounter. I don’t always get it right, but I try. Yesterday, this quote popped up in my Instagram feed, and I think it provides a lovely and gentle reminder for me — and maybe for you, too . . .
If I admire something about someone, I tell them. We humans are so fragile. It’s important we give people their flowers while they are still here. Never admire quietly.
— Chimamanda Adichie
So today . . . I choose to celebrate September 10 . . . with flowers.
No regrets, my friends.
That’s my goal.
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I took the photos in this post yesterday . . . in a special section of my garden I have dedicated to my mom. On my first Mother’s Day without her, Tom helped me expand one of my garden beds, and I plant some of her garden favorites there every year. This year, I filled the space with dahlias (the same dahlias I grew from seed last spring under my grow lights). She loved her dahlias — and I love the way they’re blooming . . . now . . . on this day.
(More of them should be blooming right now . . . but the damn deer ate all the buds off a couple of the plants long ago; the buds are coming back, though . . . It looks like one of the new buds should even open today!) (And wouldn’t that be fitting?)
What a beautiful commemoration Kym – sending hugs and thank you for the flowers and the reminder to just do it!
I love this post Kym!
Amen. Amen! Kym. (but those damned deer… I mean really!) I will hold you close in my thoughts today. (and your dahlia’s are just lovely!)
I hope your garden is filled with good memories, flowers, and buds that the deer don’t eat. It’s so important to not wait, and I thank you for this important reminder.
Beautiful post, beautiful thoughts, Kym. I hope you have a peaceful, restorative day today.
What a lovely way to remember your mother! I love dahlias too. There was a gorgeous giant deep autumnal red one in our old neighborhood. It wasn’t on my regular walking route so I used to make a little detour every now and then to take in its splendor. I think you have taken the right approach to these sadly dubious anniversaries.
Beautiful in every way.
A beautiful post in every way, Kym. Having recently lost my husband, I can confirm that one should never hold back in expressing love and appreciation. Seize the day in every way! (I have tried to comment several times, so if this is a repeat, just delete it.) 🙂
I wish there were less painful ways to learn these lessons, Kym. In honor of your advice to tell someone if you admire something about them, I will say this: I admire your writing and your gardening skills and your approach to daily living. XOXO
“Never admire quietly” is my new motto—thank you!
Thank you for sharing such a lovely and important message! Wishing you a beautiful day!
I couldn’t agree more with you. I can always use a reminder to enjoy and live every day. The peach/pink dahlia’s are gorgeous. What a lovely way to remember your Mom. She would be so happy and proud of you. Sending an extra hug your way as these anniversaries do tug at the heart and soul.
Every day! I love all of this Kym! And I hope that flower bloomed today! <3
Thanks for including us in your day. I hope the flowers were beautiful today!
I love your perspective on what could be a very sad day. I hope that bud bloomed and made you smile!
Thank you for the words I need to hear. I have been putting of some of the legal things that need to happen and I need to make a call. I’ll do it today! Just can’t wait until something happens as it will be TOO late.
I think of you this time of year as we share this month of renewed life. The 11th (yesterday) was my re-birthday. How happy am I too still be here. Honestly, I didn’t even remember yesterday was my day!