“Action is the antidote to despair.”
– Joan Baez
I have struggled for the last (far too many) years now, trying to figure out how to balance my comfortable and for the most part joyful personal life . . . with my utter despair and heartbreak at all the horrible things happening in the world around me. How can I manage my joy and this despair at the same time? How can I feel better? Where can I find hope? Who will lead us to a better future? What can I do? How can I make any difference at all?
I don’t have any answers, friends.
None.
But, as I learned from Mr. Rogers, I’ll keep looking for my helpers, and gleaning what I can from their words. One voice of reason for me has been Sharon McMahon (you may know her as @SharonSaysSo of Instagram fame) who has these words to say . . .
“When the world seems dark and full of terrible news . . . do something small and imperfect. It’s not your job to fix it all. But if we do for one person what we wish we could for everyone . . . think of how much we would change.
The antidote to despair is action. When you feel overwhelmed by bad news, instead of thinking about it nonstop like a hamster on a wheel, or choosing to ignore it because you can’t see a way to fix it and you’re only one person, do something small and imperfect. Do for one person what you wish you could do for everyone.
Bring one person a meal.
Bring one homeless veteran some warm socks.
Drop off toiletries at one domestic violence shelter.
Contribute to one GoFundMe.
If we all do something small and imperfect, we will make far more change than waiting until the perfect plan appears.
Because we ARE the plan.
Giving doesn’t just benefit the recipient. Giving changes the giver.We’re the plan. And we may learn to build the plane while flying it, but let’s get this airborn and see where it takes us.”
– Sharon McMahon, @SharonSaysSo
I set out here, on this blog and with these advent messages . . . looking for hope, and hoping to bring you some. I think, though, I’m finally understanding that . . . I need to stop looking for it, and start creating it.
As we near the end of this Advent Calendar of Comfort and Joy, maybe you’ll join me in committing to do . . . small and imperfect somethings . . . that, together, will make the world a better place.
Because . . . as it turns out . . . we ARE the plan.
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If you’re wondering what this “advent calendar” is all about, you can read my “intro” post here.
I have had similar thoughts this month Kym and my actions have been small but we have to start where we are with what we have. I appreciate your willingness to struggle with these questions right here, for all to read.
I’m on board. Thank you and happy holidays, Kym.
Thank you for this post. And thank you for being willing to share your private thoughts and vulnerability.
Many of us are right there with you. And this post is so helpful in creating a healthy mindset to a crazy world.
Such wise advice and one of the main reasons we stick it out with Kiwanis . . . even when members act silly and dramatic. Just last week someone we know through my SIL needed a Christmas tree, they were really desperate and had no money for one and the club gave them $100 to go get a tree. One small thing for us to do but it meant the world to this family. Can we make Christmas better for everyone? No. But we did make Christmas better for this one person and that’s something special.
Carole, I have a special place in my heart this Christmas for Kiwanis. Our local club held a fundraiser for a building project for B5, a non-profit I used to work for for money, and now volunteer for. They raised the last chunk of money ($120,000 – not small at all) to finish our capital campaign. We need each other to do the things we can. We’ve been serving refugee families out of two small apartments. Our little has done a lot, but oh, it will be wonderful to have space appropriate to the work we do. Yay Kiwanis — Thanks
I find this post to be critical! If each of us does one or two “little” things, what a major difference that will be. Let us all try to be the change that the world so desperately needs. Thanks for your Advent posts Kym – I’ve been enjoying them so much.
I wholeheartedly agree with you and Mother Teresa: “Not all of us can do great things, but we can do small things with great love.”
I’ve struggled with this myself. There are few people in the world who have the power to make a dramatic change, but I’m also convinced that if all of us were to do just a little to make the world a better place, the cumulative result would be bigger than the sum of those efforts. I also try to think of a quote from some of the Jewish teachings that our synagogue adopted as a theme several years ago: “You are not obligated to complete the work, but neither are you free to desist from it.” There’s some relief in feeling we don’t have to do it all ourselves, but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t contribute to the greater good.
Thank you for sharing your wisdom and insight! You are right about the change we can make by doing small things. If enough of us keep at it, I believe it can make the world better for everyone.
My sister (a political science professor) recommended that I follow @SharonSaysSo and her words of reason have helped me avoid despair by reminding me that even small acts of kindness go a long way.
I can’t help but think of the CBS news story I saw yesterday about students being inspired to form a “Secret Santa Club,” and that their doing/helping/contributing has brought so much happiness & joy to others… and also to themselves! YouTube: https://youtu.be/epReS4Db_ew?si=u3r7kdrNG8j4eBnf
I’ve been cognizant about thanking the people who make my life nicer and easier this holiday season. They are all blessings.
I have so enjoyed your posts this month (ok, I enjoy them all year long, but this month has been great!). And this sharing from Sharon is spot on!
I visited our local Care Center this past Tuesday. What a heartwarming experience. I visited with two elderly friends, one who has dementia but actually recognized me that day. I felt so blessed. And a gentleman who recently moved into the Care Center spotted me and I visited with him briefly. I can’t remember when I’ve had a warmer welcome than I did that day and I’ve resolved to go again to try to brighten their day like they brightened mine that day.
I agree with all of you. And will go off now and peruse SharonSaysSo.
All of this. And in doing one small, imperfect thing… well, one feels mighty (in my own experience) and the desire to “do it again” grows. These posts have been so meaningful to my days, Kym. Thank you! XO
There is a lot of truth in this post. Even small acts of kindness make a difference. Recently the number of people standing on and near busy intersections has increased. One young man in particular tugs at my heart because he stands near a busy coffee shop. I purchased a pair of warm gloves and handed them off to him one day. It’s a drop in the bucket but he did smile back at me.
I was just telling a friend that I think about my privilege as I am cozy and without want in a year of upheaval and hate. Giving in small ways helps someone else, which in turn you hope helps many more. Kindness grows.